Eamonn Meaney Counselling & Psychotherapy
  

Anger Management Waterford

Anger management Waterford

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned (Buddha).

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Anger Management

Anger management is a form of counselling to help you cope with any angry feelings you may have that affect your health, work, social behaviour or personal relationships.


About anger

Anger is the natural emotion we all experience as our response to a perceived threat, frustration, or assault upon our sense of self.


Common motives for anger include:

  • Losing someone you love (grief)
  • Sexual frustration
  • Being tired, hungry or in pain
  • Coming off certain medicines or drugs
  • Pre-menstrual syndrome


Mild anger can be expressed as annoyance or irritation.

However, for some people, anger can get out of control and cause problems with relationships, work and even the law. Uncontrolled anger can lead to arguments and physical fights. It can cloud your thinking and judgment and may lead to actions that are unreasonable and/or irrational.


Forms of anger:

Primary anger is a natural and healthy expression of our anger because its purpose is to find a resolution to our perceived problem.

However we can also experience anger in 3 other problematic forms:

  1. Secondary anger: Often demonstrated by men to conceal softer primary emotions like feeling hurt, sad or vulnerable.
  2. Instrumental anger: The deliberate use of anger to control, manipulate or influence others.
  3. Maladaptive anger: Perpetual toxic anger patterns borne of traumas, unmet childhood needs and/or unfinished business with significant others from your past.

Road rage or regular unforeseen, uncontrollable manifestations of anger within your relationships, friendships, or workplace are likely indications that your anger falls into one of the above categories.


Physical signs of anger:

The large quantity of stress hormones released within your body when you become angry can make you feel quite unwell. Cortisol and adrenaline increase your heart rate, blood pressure, temperature and breathing (the “fight or flight” response).

This allows you to focus on the threat and react quickly, but it can also mean that you do not think straight, and maybe react in ways you might regret later on.


Our Anger Response:

Our frame of reference for how we direct our anger towards others usually depends on the specific circumstances, our family history, cultural background, and stress levels. This is typically recognisable through:

  • sarcastic comments
  • swearing
  • shouting
  • name-calling
  • bullying
  • physical violence, such as hitting, pushing, kicking or breaking things


Other people might react to anger by hiding it or turning it inwards against themselves. They can be very angry on the inside but feel unable to let it out.

It is important to deal with anger in a healthy way that does not harm you or anyone else.


Domestic violence

If uncontrolled anger leads to domestic violence (violence or threatening behaviour within the home), there are places that offer help and support. You can talk to your GP or contact domestic violence organisations such as Refuge or Women’s Aid.


Anger and health

Intense and uncontrolled anger is linked to health conditions such as:

  • high blood pressure
  • headaches
  • backache
  • insomnia
  • skin conditions such as eczema
  • digestive disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • heart attack
  • stroke


It can weaken your immune system, making you more likely to pick up infections and less able to recover from operations, accidents or major illnesses. Anger also makes you more sensitive to pain.

If anger is hidden or buried, it can lead to:

  • eating disorders
  • self-injury
  • misuse of drugs and/or alcohol
  • low self-esteem



Managing anger

Given the extensive negative potential of anger as outlined above, the following sequence is proposed as an initial means of reclaiming your ownership of it:

  • Admit:acknowledge your anger problem or that you are angry more than others.
  • Accept: accept the nature of your anger as this enables clarity in formulating strategies to address it.
  • Address:Implement plans to manage your anger.

Waterford Counselling Centre offers you professional support in managing your anger through a 5 step approach:

  • Exploring Triggers: Identify the cues which enable you to set yourself up!
  • Cognitive Restructuring: Addressing ways you have conditioned your mind to respond.
  • Anger Release Options: Rather than self-medicating finding healthy routes to release negative emotions.
  • Awareness and Control: Assessing your thoughts, emotions, physicality and behaviour in order to monitor and amend your anger levels.
  • Exploring & resolving sources of anger from your past: Collaboratively and non-judgementally reviewing the initiating events from which your anger emanates.


Your anger is a habit of your mind. You can change the way you have conditioned yourself to respond and react. Acknowledging the existence of this psychologically crippling emotion can be a vehicle to access and release you from its potentially damaging and indefinite stranglehold.

Alternative thought, and response patterns can be utilised to develop new and truer coping strategies. Remember you are not your thoughts and your anger does not have to define who you are or who you can be.

Seeking and accepting support is a strength and not a weakness so please feel free to contact me 

Anger Management

Anger management is a form of counselling to help you cope with any angry feelings you may have that affect your health, work, social behaviour or personal relationships.


About anger

Anger is the natural emotion we all experience as our response to a perceived threat, frustration, or assault upon our sense of self.


Common motives for anger include:

  • Losing someone you love (grief)
  • Sexual frustration
  • Being tired, hungry or in pain
  • Coming off certain medicines or drugs
  • Pre-menstrual syndrome


Mild anger can be expressed as annoyance or irritation.

However, for some people, anger can get out of control and cause problems with relationships, work and even the law. Uncontrolled anger can lead to arguments and physical fights. It can cloud your thinking and judgment and may lead to actions that are unreasonable and/or irrational.


Forms of anger:

Primary anger is a natural and healthy expression of our anger because its purpose is to find a resolution to our perceived problem.

However we can also experience anger in 3 other problematic forms:

  1. Secondary anger: Often demonstrated by men to conceal softer primary emotions like feeling hurt, sad or vulnerable.
  2. Instrumental anger: The deliberate use of anger to control, manipulate or influence others.
  3. Maladaptive anger: Perpetual toxic anger patterns borne of traumas, unmet childhood needs and/or unfinished business with significant others from your past.

Road rage or regular unforeseen, uncontrollable manifestations of anger within your relationships, friendships, or workplace are likely indications that your anger falls into one of the above categories.


Physical signs of anger:

The large quantity of stress hormones released within your body when you become angry can make you feel quite unwell. Cortisol and adrenaline increase your heart rate, blood pressure, temperature and breathing (the “fight or flight” response).

This allows you to focus on the threat and react quickly, but it can also mean that you do not think straight, and maybe react in ways you might regret later on.


Our Anger Response:

Our frame of reference for how we direct our anger towards others usually depends on the specific circumstances, our family history, cultural background, and stress levels. This is typically recognisable through:

  • sarcastic comments
  • swearing
  • shouting
  • name-calling
  • bullying
  • physical violence, such as hitting, pushing, kicking or breaking things


Other people might react to anger by hiding it or turning it inwards against themselves. They can be very angry on the inside but feel unable to let it out.

It is important to deal with anger in a healthy way that does not harm you or anyone else.


Domestic violence

If uncontrolled anger leads to domestic violence (violence or threatening behaviour within the home), there are places that offer help and support. You can talk to your GP or contact domestic violence organisations such as Refuge or Women’s Aid.


Anger and health

Intense and uncontrolled anger is linked to health conditions such as:

  • high blood pressure
  • headaches
  • backache
  • insomnia
  • skin conditions such as eczema
  • digestive disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • heart attack
  • stroke


It can weaken your immune system, making you more likely to pick up infections and less able to recover from operations, accidents or major illnesses. Anger also makes you more sensitive to pain.

If anger is hidden or buried, it can lead to:

  • eating disorders
  • self-injury
  • misuse of drugs and/or alcohol
  • low self-esteem



Managing anger

Given the extensive negative potential of anger as outlined above, the following sequence is proposed as an initial means of reclaiming your ownership of it:

  • Admit:acknowledge your anger problem or that you are angry more than others.
  • Accept: accept the nature of your anger as this enables clarity in formulating strategies to address it.
  • Address:Implement plans to manage your anger.

Waterford Counselling Centre offers you professional support in managing your anger through a 5 step approach:

  • Exploring Triggers: Identify the cues which enable you to set yourself up!
  • Cognitive Restructuring: Addressing ways you have conditioned your mind to respond.
  • Anger Release Options: Rather than self-medicating finding healthy routes to release negative emotions.
  • Awareness and Control: Assessing your thoughts, emotions, physicality and behaviour in order to monitor and amend your anger levels.
  • Exploring & resolving sources of anger from your past: Collaboratively and non-judgementally reviewing the initiating events from which your anger emanates.


Your anger is a habit of your mind. You can change the way you have conditioned yourself to respond and react. Acknowledging the existence of this psychologically crippling emotion can be a vehicle to access and release you from its potentially damaging and indefinite stranglehold.

Alternative thought, and response patterns can be utilised to develop new and truer coping strategies. Remember you are not your thoughts and your anger does not have to define who you are or who you can be.

Seeking and accepting support is a strength and not a weakness so please feel free to contact me 

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned (Buddha).

Get in touch